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Nightowlhoot3


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RE: pimp this bum
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BoxDog wrote:

Nightowlhoot3 wrote:

I guess that makes me more selective in how I contribute to "the poor" and really sort of need to know they really are, before I make what is really going to be a financial sacrifice on my part, because really, with only so much money, you do want to see it get into the hands of those who really need it, rather than some shyster.



Those last words are really the core of the problem with the current system. The majority of government funds are filtered through the paws of our elected officials, aka, the original shysters. So, yeah, left on our own, we do what we can, the best we're able to. I suspect in the end that will have a much broader impact on society, relations and immediate change anyway. It has to feel better to get that blanket, bologna sandwich or, in Bens case 12 pack from a neighbor, peer, regular ole jane.



I don't know about that ... cry Sounds "right" on the surface, really, but we're talking here about dignity, too, and "pride" and sometimes, it's easier to accept help from impersonal entities than "real" people in your life. Sort of the "behind closed doors" thing, you know? And too, sometimes a person you know will offer a helping hand, and then turn around and use that past help as a weapon against you.

I've been oddly blessed with seeing this issue from both sides. I say "blessed" because sympathy, while fine in its own right, cannot hold a candle to empathy, even if the source of that empathy is in the past. I got my financial "come uppins" a few years ago, when basically, my whole world disintegrated, and I had to do things I'd never before imagined myself doing, in order to survive. It was an astounding, jaw dropping learning experience to be sure, on more levels than I can adequately express. I moved into a wholly new and different level of society, of which I'd only casually been aware before, and finally "got it" about so many things ...

Now that I'm in a different (and more familiar) place <knock wood> I see, almost daily, how that time changed me, even though I was never before one to demean or diminish a person in that situation.

This economic implosion may carry with it some subtle "perks" as more and more people glimpse life on the other side of that steady paycheck. Seems to me we're apt, as a nation, to go one of two ways -- either we'll become MORE stingy with what we have, and more strongly enforce the divide between the haves and the have nots, or we'll turn to bridge building of a sort, and not be so quick to judge those in the grocery store line ahead of them with that "food stamp" card.

It will be interesting to see what happens.

 



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Anonymous

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See, here's my deal: it irks me to have people lie to me. It also irks me that there are some who simply do this for a living by choice.

Which I'll take one step further.

I'm familiar with an able bodied couple (man and woman) who are in their late thirties and mooch off a local church. Both unemployed, both living for a time with several different members of said church (for free) and now living in a space donated to them over a library. 

Both are fully capable of working, matter of fact he enjoys sharing his experience with anyone standing still long enough to hear it. So now a debate has sprung up between members of this church regarding "condoning a lifestyle" vs. "lending a hand". Several members want them cut off completely and a few express fear about that happening.

Nobody is asking me, but if they did, I fall squarely in the "get any job you can for now" and at least contribute to your own welfare.

nesea

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BoxDog


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Nightowlhoot3 wrote:

Psych Lit wrote:


whats everyones attitude on giving money to a panhandler? i always give a buck or two not much i know and ill believe the food story and really?  there but for fortune...
i remember being in boulder a couple of years ago and they had these vouchers that one could buy and the vouchers could be used at certain stores and restaurants. the idea was if someone came and asked for money you could hand them one of these vouchers. seemed a bit patronizing to me but again i get the reasoning for it.

http://www.ascendgence.com/pimpthisbum/index.aspx
See, here's my deal: it irks me to have people lie to me. It also irks me that there are some who simply do this for a living by choice. There are so many people who REALLY NEED help, and the scoundrels are wrecking it for them.

When I was a kid, a guy came to our door and asked for money for food. My Dad didn't want to give him any, and I was pretty upset by that, and finally convinced him to. After the guy left, Dad bundled me up and put me in the car, and the two of us drove a few blocks to "Gene's Liquor Store" and sat in the parking lot, and sure enough, along came the panhandler, and he went inside, and within a few minutes, emerged with a bottle, and Dad said: "See?"and I felt the fool.

It was a hard lesson to learn.

I've given away lots of food, and blankets to people who have asked me for money for same. I've bought cheap ponchos and driven around when it's the rainy season and handed them out to people who seemed to need them. Ditto glove and socks. I've had people go into the grocery store outside which they're standing, and buy the forumla or what they say the need for them with my debit card. I used to carry bus tickets with me, because the going line around here is: "I just need a couple of dollars for a bus ticket." When I offer them the ticket, though, they don't want it. Panhandlers LIVE at the gas station/mini mart down the street. I see some there on what surely must be regular shifts. Sometimes, they'll approach me and say they just need a couple of bucks for gas to get back home. I'll offer to use my debit card to put gas in their car, but they don't want that. A lot of times they don't even have a car there, but instead, a bicycle. 

On the way to work one time, a friend and I saw a guy holding a sign which read: Need money for beer." She was so inspired by his honesty, she went and bought him a 12 pack. 

I think sometimes you KNOW if someone is legit or not, and that decides whether or not you'll give something to them. I don't deal with cash, though. Don't use it at all for anything. If I can get them what they say they need with my debit card, and it's not too expensive, I will. I've taken "risks" with strangers no adult woman should take as far as offering to give them a ride where they say they need to go, or whatever, but I just don't carry cash, and so don't hand it out to anyone -- including store clerks.  I guess my bottom line is I'm willing to help, but not willing to be a patsy. I'll share what I have with someone who needs it more than me, but I don't have a lot of money. Matter of fact, I hardly have any money at all. :) Somehow, I manage to scrape by every month, but it's always sort of a miracle that I do. I guess that makes me more selective in how I contribute to "the poor" and really sort of need to know they really are, before I make what is really going to be a financial sacrifice on my part, because really, with only so much money, you do want to see it get into the hands of those who really need it, rather than some shyster.



Those last words are really the core of the problem with the current system. The majority of government funds are filtered through the paws of our elected officials, aka, the original shysters. So, yeah, left on our own, we do what we can, the best we're able to. I suspect in the end that will have a much broader impact on society, relations and immediate change anyway. It has to feel better to get that blanket, bologna sandwich or, in Bens case 12 pack from a neighbor, peer, regular ole jane.



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My Turn


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just the other day i saw one of the homeless guys holding a sign....but instead of the usual, will work for food...this one said:  "why lie. need beer. "

blankstare


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Anonymous

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Psych Lit wrote:

ok, ill admit im struggling with this.  the creators of this site say that they chose that name to schock people into paying attention to the plight of the homeless. i get that. but there is a way in which the "this bum" sort of rankles me. This is a human being the diminishing to the "this bum" just seems beyond some sort of necessary something. i dont know. it bothers me any way.

i wonder tho. have we become so hardened as a society that we can, as the website states, blithely skip on by a site that says feed the homeless?

whats everyones attitude on giving money to a panhandler? i always give a buck or two not much i know and ill believe the food story and really?  there but for fortune...
i remember being in boulder a couple of years ago and they had these vouchers that one could buy and the vouchers could be used at certain stores and restaurants. the idea was if someone came and asked for money you could hand them one of these vouchers. seemed a bit patronizing to me but again i get the reasoning for it.

http://www.ascendgence.com/pimpthisbum/index.aspx


I use to have a strick rule to not give money but, times have changed. I still am less likely to with certain sterotypical appearing "panhandlers" and, will only after and, if, I am able to spend time to be certain that is the way I wanted my money spent. It is incredible how many homeless I am running across these days and, so many too proud to ask. There lies my notice. I hate the name of this site Psyche for all the obvious reasons. I like the voucher idea. I have chosen not to give money so many times when asked if the person is drunk or high. And, have felt horrible because, they are the ones that are left outside with those elements because, shelters wont take them. me

 



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Nightowlhoot3


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Posts: 1307
Date:
Permalink   

Psych Lit wrote:


whats everyones attitude on giving money to a panhandler? i always give a buck or two not much i know and ill believe the food story and really?  there but for fortune...
i remember being in boulder a couple of years ago and they had these vouchers that one could buy and the vouchers could be used at certain stores and restaurants. the idea was if someone came and asked for money you could hand them one of these vouchers. seemed a bit patronizing to me but again i get the reasoning for it.

http://www.ascendgence.com/pimpthisbum/index.aspx
See, here's my deal: it irks me to have people lie to me. It also irks me that there are some who simply do this for a living by choice. There are so many people who REALLY NEED help, and the scoundrels are wrecking it for them.

When I was a kid, a guy came to our door and asked for money for food. My Dad didn't want to give him any, and I was pretty upset by that, and finally convinced him to. After the guy left, Dad bundled me up and put me in the car, and the two of us drove a few blocks to "Gene's Liquor Store" and sat in the parking lot, and sure enough, along came the panhandler, and he went inside, and within a few minutes, emerged with a bottle, and Dad said: "See?"and I felt the fool.

It was a hard lesson to learn.

I've given away lots of food, and blankets to people who have asked me for money for same. I've bought cheap ponchos and driven around when it's the rainy season and handed them out to people who seemed to need them. Ditto glove and socks. I've had people go into the grocery store outside which they're standing, and buy the forumla or what they say the need for them with my debit card. I used to carry bus tickets with me, because the going line around here is: "I just need a couple of dollars for a bus ticket." When I offer them the ticket, though, they don't want it. Panhandlers LIVE at the gas station/mini mart down the street. I see some there on what surely must be regular shifts. Sometimes, they'll approach me and say they just need a couple of bucks for gas to get back home. I'll offer to use my debit card to put gas in their car, but they don't want that. A lot of times they don't even have a car there, but instead, a bicycle. 

On the way to work one time, a friend and I saw a guy holding a sign which read: Need money for beer." She was so inspired by his honesty, she went and bought him a 12 pack. 

I think sometimes you KNOW if someone is legit or not, and that decides whether or not you'll give something to them. I don't deal with cash, though. Don't use it at all for anything. If I can get them what they say they need with my debit card, and it's not too expensive, I will. I've taken "risks" with strangers no adult woman should take as far as offering to give them a ride where they say they need to go, or whatever, but I just don't carry cash, and so don't hand it out to anyone -- including store clerks.  I guess my bottom line is I'm willing to help, but not willing to be a patsy. I'll share what I have with someone who needs it more than me, but I don't have a lot of money. Matter of fact, I hardly have any money at all. :) Somehow, I manage to scrape by every month, but it's always sort of a miracle that I do. I guess that makes me more selective in how I contribute to "the poor" and really sort of need to know they really are, before I make what is really going to be a financial sacrifice on my part, because really, with only so much money, you do want to see it get into the hands of those who really need it, rather than some shyster.



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BoxDog


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Status: Offline
Posts: 515
Date:
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Psych Lit wrote:

ok, ill admit im struggling with this.  the creators of this site say that they chose that name to schock people into paying attention to the plight of the homeless. i get that. but there is a way in which the "this bum" sort of rankles me. This is a human being the diminishing to the "this bum" just seems beyond some sort of necessary something. i dont know. it bothers me any way.

i wonder tho. have we become so hardened as a society that we can, as the website states, blithely skip on by a site that says feed the homeless?

whats everyones attitude on giving money to a panhandler? i always give a buck or two not much i know and ill believe the food story and really?  there but for fortune...
i remember being in boulder a couple of years ago and they had these vouchers that one could buy and the vouchers could be used at certain stores and restaurants. the idea was if someone came and asked for money you could hand them one of these vouchers. seemed a bit patronizing to me but again i get the reasoning for it.

http://www.ascendgence.com/pimpthisbum/index.aspx



See, I find that an excellent concept. At face value. I don't find it condescending to streamline an assistance program and establish rules. I want homeless hungry people to have shelter and food. After that, then we build. But the foundation is NOT a pack of smokes and a quart of beer.  Sadly, near any social program, be they city, state, federal or privately sanctioned will be bastardized. Enough to leave a sour taste to many on the fringe or completely out of the loop of the worlds social state and some in full blown denial. Reminds me of being followed once in a grocery store by a very aggressive dirtbag who insisted that I would pay for my groceries with his welfare card and then reimburse him some arbitrary amount he plucked out of the air, in cash. Eventually I decided the only thing I could do was to "speak his language" so to be on the same page and paragraph. I told the mnfr to get out of my face or I would harm him. But that's what tends to happen in those programs. It's what happens in not so "welfare"esque programs. I've seen sheltered, working people sell gift cards for cash. Is there really a difference? Or is it the mother of invention and the laws of survival?  It is supply and demand.



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Anonymous

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sorry, forgot to add my name

nesea

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Anonymous

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i wonder tho. have we become so hardened as a society that we can, as the website states, blithely skip on by a site that says feed the homeless?

I think it depends on your daily proximity to it. I'm guessing urban dwellers see it enough to ... well, to not see it much anymore. Suburban or rural living might reduce the "normality" of it.
 
As an aside, I live in the burbs, about 15 - 20 mins. from a city and every trip into that city you'll see the same folks, at the same places, holding out the same hand. Don't know if it's true or not but rumor has it that these people actually make a fair living.

whats everyones attitude on giving money to a panhandler? i always give a buck or two not much i know and ill believe the food story and really?  there but for fortune...


Handouts are usually a spur of the moment decision for me. Most of the time I don't give money, but there have been times when I have. Not even sure I could tell you what was different and prompted me to react one way or the other in those instances where I did respond, which makes me think it's more about my state of mind then about the panhandler in front of me.






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Psych Lit


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ok, ill admit im struggling with this.  the creators of this site say that they chose that name to schock people into paying attention to the plight of the homeless. i get that. but there is a way in which the "this bum" sort of rankles me. This is a human being the diminishing to the "this bum" just seems beyond some sort of necessary something. i dont know. it bothers me any way.

i wonder tho. have we become so hardened as a society that we can, as the website states, blithely skip on by a site that says feed the homeless?

whats everyones attitude on giving money to a panhandler? i always give a buck or two not much i know and ill believe the food story and really?  there but for fortune...
i remember being in boulder a couple of years ago and they had these vouchers that one could buy and the vouchers could be used at certain stores and restaurants. the idea was if someone came and asked for money you could hand them one of these vouchers. seemed a bit patronizing to me but again i get the reasoning for it.

http://www.ascendgence.com/pimpthisbum/index.aspx

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