BoxDog wrote:I'm still struggling with my "last song". Now I have to pick a "safe word"?
They can be the same...
Uh-oh. That would render my "safe word", moot?
Well, if you're DEAD, I don't think anyone can hurt you...
;) Well, really, if my safe word were most efficient I would be very much alive. There would probably be a casualty and I'd be dancing to Amanda Lamberts ""Gunpowder and Lead". But here goes, for the record, my safe word is "rodeo-clown". So, if ever you find me on the other end of the line yelling rodeo clown, hang up and change your numbers. Everyone. Next challenge?
Years ago, my friend was riding across country with her two small kids and her psycho husband. Truly psycho.
They were gearing up for divorce at the time, and he'd pretty much totally flipped out, and was using drugs and stuff, and ... it just wasn't a good scene at all. Nonetheless, she consented to go so that the kids and the grandparents (his parents) could have a visit.
I didn't feel good about. Not good at all. There was just too much werid stuff happening ... like ... she was going to do some of the driving, but he refused to let her renew her driver's licence, so she had to sneak over here, and do it online, on my PC. Like I said: "weird." So, before she left, I insisted we agree upon an "I'm not safe" word. We did, and I'm not going to use it here, so let's just say it was ... uhhhhhhh... "dishwasher." The deal was, she was to call me at certain times, and if she was in a bad situation, she was to say the word "dishwasher" and if she did... I wasn't sure what I'd do, but the police would be involved.
I was thinking earlier this evening that I should probably call and ask her if she remembers the word (I do.)
One thing I learned was that you are well served to pick a word that may actually be nonchalantly slipped into a conversation, but at the same time, not a word too common, which you might use by mistake, like ... "peanut" or something.
Oh, and PLEASE don't do what she did to me, and call and say: "Hey, we're fine -- made it safely, and are now headed back home, no problems, or anything -- we're completely safe -- no "dishwashers" at all ..."
Make sure you BOTH understand that you DO NOT say "the" word at ALL unless you mean business. Also, people who aren't good "actors" might use a little play acting before hand, using the word in conversation in prechosen sentences, so that they're not grasping for something in a moment of panic, and belt out "DISHWASHER!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Also, the person hearing the word shouldn't (I would think) say: "OMG -- did you just say DISHWASHER?? Are you in danger??" in case the danger is listening in on the conversation. I would think the key would be to be as nonchalant as possible, and then try to get any pertinent information in that same casual vein, like location, etc.
Anyway, I was just remembering that, and thought I'd mention it. Really, it's not so bad an idea to have a word like that, I'm thinkin'. I know kids have "safe" words that people who say pick them up from school in place of Mom know, and can say, so the kid knows it's OK to go with them. I don't know if other people have "danger" words, or not, but I'm thinking it would be a good idea -- I might even suggest it to my Mom tomorrow. it's a dangerous world out there; what could it hurt, to have a "just in case" plan in place, yanno?
-- Edited by Nightowlhoot3 at 20:44, 2008-11-30
I'm still struggling with my "last song". Now I have to pick a "safe word"?
for me, when i need a code word in case i need to relay to friends that i need assistance, it has always been chap stick....lol. and i make it clear prior that i am going to use it that day/night/event if i feel i need it. easy for me cause i always, always have chapstick either in my car or my pocket. therefore, if i say to my friend, can i borrow your chapstick, or i forgot my chapstick can you bring me some, it is a clear signal that i need help. plus, the can "you bring me" part allows me to give a location if this person is not in the immediate vicinity.
cool. i always thought i was the only wierdo who did this...!
They were gearing up for divorce at the time, and he'd pretty much totally flipped out, and was using drugs and stuff, and ... it just wasn't a good scene at all. Nonetheless, she consented to go so that the kids and the grandparents (his parents) could have a visit.
im hoping that she did follow thru?
I was thinking earlier this evening that I should probably call and ask her if she remembers the word (I do.)
One thing I learned was that you are well served to pick a word that may actually be nonchalantly slipped into a conversation, but at the same time, not a word too common, which you might use by mistake, like ... "peanut" or something.
Oh, and PLEASE don't do what she did to me, and call and say: "Hey, we're fine -- made it safely, and are now headed back home, no problems, or anything -- we're completely safe -- no "dishwashers" at all ..."
lol
Anyway, I was just remembering that, and thought I'd mention it. Really, it's not so bad an idea to have a word like that, I'm thinkin'. I know kids have "safe" words that people who say pick them up from school in place of Mom know, and can say, so the kid knows it's OK to go with them. I don't know if other people have "danger" words, or not, but I'm thinking it would be a good idea -- I might even suggest it to my Mom tomorrow. it's a dangerous world out there; what could it hurt, to have a "just in case" plan in place, yanno?
it cant hurt tho the trick here is to remember the word when its not tied into a crisis event like your friends drive. i gave my kids safe words when they were young and drilled them on the whole dont talk to strangers thing. (they even had a book id read to them frequently,i can remember one of the lines from it. if youre ever in a zoo and a giraffe walks up to you and says how do you do? remember! dont talk to strangers!) but the thing is that when the actual occurances came up, my sending someone to pick them up at school or someone offering one of them a ride home they didnt even think about the safe word. sigh. happily nothing bad ever happened to any of them but remembering out of context can be a tough thing!
but i do agree the world is really getting to be a scary place and a place where anything we can think of to make it safer is prolly welcome. ive been caught up in that whole mumbai thing this weekend and thinking about how easily that might happen in any city in america and what might we do as individuals if it did? for the first time in my life ive been giving serious thought to getting a handgun. of course the risky places i frequent where i might have a need for one, the airport, the u, the train station, the public bus to the train, crowded restaurants, the library, all frown on weapons so its prolly not worth it to get one. the more likely event would be that someone would break in while im sleeping and shoot me with it.
Years ago, my friend was riding across country with her two small kids and her psycho husband. Truly psycho.
They were gearing up for divorce at the time, and he'd pretty much totally flipped out, and was using drugs and stuff, and ... it just wasn't a good scene at all. Nonetheless, she consented to go so that the kids and the grandparents (his parents) could have a visit.
I didn't feel good about. Not good at all. There was just too much werid stuff happening ... like ... she was going to do some of the driving, but he refused to let her renew her driver's licence, so she had to sneak over here, and do it online, on my PC. Like I said: "weird." So, before she left, I insisted we agree upon an "I'm not safe" word. We did, and I'm not going to use it here, so let's just say it was ... uhhhhhhh... "dishwasher." The deal was, she was to call me at certain times, and if she was in a bad situation, she was to say the word "dishwasher" and if she did... I wasn't sure what I'd do, but the police would be involved.
I was thinking earlier this evening that I should probably call and ask her if she remembers the word (I do.)
One thing I learned was that you are well served to pick a word that may actually be nonchalantly slipped into a conversation, but at the same time, not a word too common, which you might use by mistake, like ... "peanut" or something.
Oh, and PLEASE don't do what she did to me, and call and say: "Hey, we're fine -- made it safely, and are now headed back home, no problems, or anything -- we're completely safe -- no "dishwashers" at all ..."
Make sure you BOTH understand that you DO NOT say "the" word at ALL unless you mean business. Also, people who aren't good "actors" might use a little play acting before hand, using the word in conversation in prechosen sentences, so that they're not grasping for something in a moment of panic, and belt out "DISHWASHER!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Also, the person hearing the word shouldn't (I would think) say: "OMG -- did you just say DISHWASHER?? Are you in danger??" in case the danger is listening in on the conversation. I would think the key would be to be as nonchalant as possible, and then try to get any pertinent information in that same casual vein, like location, etc.
Anyway, I was just remembering that, and thought I'd mention it. Really, it's not so bad an idea to have a word like that, I'm thinkin'. I know kids have "safe" words that people who say pick them up from school in place of Mom know, and can say, so the kid knows it's OK to go with them. I don't know if other people have "danger" words, or not, but I'm thinking it would be a good idea -- I might even suggest it to my Mom tomorrow. it's a dangerous world out there; what could it hurt, to have a "just in case" plan in place, yanno?
