Psych Lit wrote:

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BoxDog wrote:

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It's not even changing at a snails pace. It's not changing at all. But yanno? Don't go to the sit in, the park, the gayday that can't take place because of cash. Don't come out of the freaking closet. Do we control our own lives or does someone else. It's alot to ask of a college sophomore, but too bad. There is a critical need to be LOUD. And now that I'm all pissed off I just realized it isn't her freaking JOB to take a stigma out of anything, it's her job to coach a team. I hope her 401k tanked along with all her millions. And she can go to the same hell as Pat Summit for all I care.

there has been some change tho its slow. ive heard these rumors for many many years which is why i found the original blog so offensive. it is as always about the money. these coaches want to make womens sports as popular and lucrative as the male versions and their homophobia allows them to feel that the 'lesbian stigma" will prevent this from happening. apparently they arent paying a lot of attention to who buys the tickets:) ok so there are straight people there too but if lesbians boycotted these events revenues and interest would surely fall wayyy down.   back to the change. this is a pdf file so its heavy to load. but yes the key here is to not be silent when faced with this kind of action by anyone in authority.

http://www.nclrights.org/site/DocServer/Final_Negative_Recruiting_FINAL.pdf?docID=5461

also the woman in this article sued and psu settled. from outsports

Settling can mean victory
Reflections on the Rene Portland - Jen Harris Lawsuit Settlement

By Pat Griffin

Editor's Note: Penn State and former Nittany Lion basketball player Jennifer Harris on Monday announced a settlement of Harris' case regarding anti-lesbian actions of head basketball coach Rene Portland. Harris was represented in the case by the National Center for Lesbian Rights. Terms of the settlement were not disclosed.

Discuss the Rene Portland - Jen Harris lawsuit

At first reading I was not sure what to think about the settlement of the Jennifer Harris lawsuit against Penn State and womens basketball coach Rene Portland. As an educator and advocate for lesbian and gay people in athletics for many years, I am hungry for change and this case represented a huge opportunity to call attention to a persistent problem in athletics: discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. The terms of settlement are confidential so it is impossible to know what agreements were made.The joint statement released to the press by both parties in the lawsuit was so carefully crafted that, at first, I could not tell whether to be pleased or upset about the settlement.

I am not a lawyer (and I dont even play one on TV), so I consulted a friend who is a lawyer to help me interpret what the settlement statement means. She helped me to understand that agreeing to a settlement can often be the most positive outcome and that making the terms confidential, a common legal provision, actually can facilitate more far-reaching positive changes. She told me that in a case like this, where Jen Harris is no longer a student at Penn State, the only thing that litigation could achieve would be a financial settlement. A settlement, in contrast, probably means that Penn State, in addition to agreeing to a financial payout to Jen Harris, has also agreed to other terms that have far greater potential to change the climate at Penn State for future students. My lawyer friend also pointed out that going to litigation exacts a huge financial and emotional toll on all participants, a consequence that often overshadows the outcome. One thing seems clear though after reading the report of the settlement: Rene Portland is still the womens basketball coach at Penn State and that does upset me despite feeling much better about the settlement after talking to my friend the lawyer.

When I first learned about the lawsuit against Rene Portland and Penn State, my initial reaction was, Finally, something will be done to stop 20 some years of rumored bigotry that have reigned unchecked in the PSU womens basketball program. I admit it I was excited by the possibility that Rene Portland was finally going down. I thought that this would be the most powerful way to send a message to all coaches, parents and student-athletes that anti-lesbian discrimination, long accepted in athletics, will no longer be tolerated.

Everyone I know who is familiar with womens college basketball has heard the rumors or has talked privately to former PSU basketball players or recruits who confirmed the stories: Rene Portland has enforced a no lesbian policy for over 20 years. I myself talked to a mother and daughter years ago who told me that Portland had announced, unasked, during a home visit that she did not allow lesbians on her team. Taken aback by this blatant bigotry, the family crossed Penn State off their list of prospective schools. If only all families responded this way. Portland herself affirmed her policy in a 1986 Chicago Sun-Times article. Jen Harris charges against Portland were more of the same, but she was the first athlete to take legal action.

In 1991, a Philadelphia Inquirer article included reports that some unnamed former Lady Lions confirmed Portlands no lesbian policy. The mainstream press reaction to this article was soundly critical of Portland and Penn State, which at the time did not include sexual orientation in the school non-discrimination policy. Campus protests jammed the athletic department phone and fax lines and rallies condemned Portland. Later that year, Penn State added sexual orientation to the school non-discrimination policy. I was called in by the Penn State Administration to work with the athletic department on addressing lesbian and gay issues at Penn State. The workshop was difficult and it was clear to me that there was no real departmental or institutional commitment to challenging anti-gay discrimination at Penn State. I felt like a pawn in the universitys attempt to cover its hind quarters by requiring the standard one off diversity training.

So, its no surprise that Im disappointed that the settlement does not include the demand that Rene Portland step down as the Lady Lions coach. That said, however, I believe that the Portland-Harris-Penn State law suit is a huge step inthe on-going effort to make athletics more inclusive and respectful for lesbian and gay people.

In the joint statement released by both parties in the lawsuit Penn State, Athletic Director Tim Curley and Rene Portland deny any liability with respect to the complaints filed against them. Jennifer Harris agrees to permanently withdraw and end her legal actions against all parties. She also stated that she is proud to have brought the case and thrilled that we have been able to resolve it.

Karen Doering, the NCLR lawyer representing Harris, said that the university has taken additional steps to further protect all students who have experienced discriminatory treatment at Penn State. What do these statements mean? This is where my friend the lawyer advised me to read between the lines. It is standard for the defendants in a case (Penn State and Rene Portland) to deny liability. What is important is that Jen Harris and her lawyers from the NCLR are happy with the settlement. I dont believe they would be happy if the settlement did not include significant agreements that can change the landscape of athletics. Did the university agree to a substantial financial settlement to make the lawsuit go away? Probably. Did they agree to more careful oversight of Portlands practices and regular training for all staff, athletic and academic, at Penn State? I think that is what Doerings quote is telling us.

Perhaps the biggest loser in this case is Penn State University. The universitys reputation has been tarnished by their tepid response to the lawsuit and their support of Portland. Penn States own internal investigation of the Harris charges found that Portland had indeed created a hostile, intimidating and offensive climate. Unfortunately, Penn State chickened out when it came to punishing Portland for her actions: A slap on the wrist $10,000 fine, required participation in (another) personalized diversity training session with an unnamed consultant, closer monitoring of Portlands practices and promised dismissal for further discriminatory actions.

After the lawsuit was filed in 2005, the National Center for Lesbian Rights lawyers announced that, following Jen Harris lead, several former players and PSU athletic staff were ready to testify to Portlands history of anti-lesbian discrimination. These witnesses added to the damning findings of PSUs own internal investigation. Clearly, Portland can no longer credibly claim that this is about one disgruntled athlete or that she has not discriminated against athletes in the past.

I assume (and hope) that Jen Harris received generous financial relief. If PSU doesnt have the integrity to dismiss an employee whom they found in violation of their own non-discrimination policy, at least the school should feel the pain of their choices in the institutional pocketbook. The bigger the financial aspects of the settlement the better so that, at the very least, the message to other institutions is that discrimination is expensive. In a time of educational budget crunches, what school wants to spend many thousands of dollars in settlement and legal defense costs?

In addition to the financial costs, PSU has received mountains of negative press over the lawsuit and the inconsequential punishments they meted out for the findings of their own investigation of Portlands practices.  I am sure that administrators in other schools have taken note and probably shudder at the thought of finding themselves in the middle of this kind of public relations nightmare. For the most part, polls show that the general public does not condone discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and response to the press coverage of the Penn State situation confirms this perspective.

It is difficult to imagine how PSU officials think that all of the negative publicity and expense is worth keeping Portland on. She must have some powerful support in well-heeled places among PSU alumni and other powerful people at Penn State. The reactions of the university to the allegations have tainted PSU s reputation and integrity and will continue to affect the women's basketball teams reputation as long as Portland is the face of the Lady Lions. It is probably no coincidence that last season and this season have been sub-par for the team. The Lady Lions face organized protests at away games and the ongoing negative publicity swirling around Portland leaves a stink on the team and the university that will not go away until Portland does. Until then, perhaps Portland is the coach that PSU deserves.

I am hopeful that one of the most significant far reaching results of the Penn State affair is that other schools will be smarter and more proactive about avoiding the mess that Penn State has been mired in for the last two years. I dont think any university president or athletic director will want to take a call from NCLR in the future. They will be more likely to educate their staff about institutional policy and legal requirements, monitor staff more closely and respond to accusations of discrimination more seriously.

Another positive outcome of the settlement is that Jen Harris, the courageous young woman who decided to challenge what she experienced as the discriminatory practices of a powerful coach, will finally be able to get on with her life. She can try to pick up the pieces of her basketball and academic career at James Madison University where she is now enrolled.

She and her family, with the legal guidance of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, took on a major university and a powerful coach. It is important not to lose sight of the courage this action took. Many young athletes facing similar situations do not have the strength or support to challenge unfair treatment at the hands of an established coach. Instead they quietly transfer to another school hoping to find a place to play ball in a more accepting climate. The cost of silence is high for these young people, in self-esteem and in athletic opportunities forfeited.

The stress, visibility and responsibility accompanying Jen Harriss decision to fight back must be crushing for a 20-year-old African-American woman who surely envisioned her college athletic career being very different from the one she has endured over the last two years. Her lawsuit shone the light of day on Portlands unethical practices and a universitys head in the sand tolerance of hostile, intimidating and offensive actions that violate its own non-discrimination policy. Jen Harris chose to fight back and everyone who cares about respectful treatment of all athletes should be grateful for her courage in challenging Portland and Penn State. The national dialogue and platform for discussion of discrimination issues in athletics that this case sparked has already encouraged actions for positive change.

In October 2006, NCLR and the NCAA co-sponsored a national think tank on negative recruiting based on sexual orientation in collegiate athletics. This first-of-its-kind meeting was attended by athletic leaders from all over the United States and the action initiatives that came out of that meeting hold great promise for positive change. I am not sure that, without the lessons from Portland-Harris lawsuit, the momentum and support needed to make this think tank happen, or the overwhelmingly committed interest among attendees, would have been as high. I believe that one of the positive outcomes of the Harris case is that university and athletic leaders are increasingly clear about the necessity of developing policy and instituting education programs that protect student-athletes from the discriminatory practices apparently tolerated at Penn State for over twenty years.

Jen Harris represents a new generation of student-athletes and their families who are willing to challenge discrimination rather than suffer in silence as so many have in the past. I also believe that Penn State and Rene Portland represent the last generation of institutions and coaches that tolerate or practice discrimination against athletes on the basis of their presumed or actual sexual orientation.

Thank you, NCLR, and thank you, Jen Harris, for leading us further down the path toward sports equality for all.

Pat Griffin, Director of It Takes A Team! Education Campaign for LGBT Issues in Sport, Author of "Strong Women, Deep Closets: Lesbians and Homophobia in Sport." She can be reached at griffin@educ.umass.edu

 

 

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Basically, I do NOT believe that "settllements" are an indicator or real start to any significant change. They are intended to, and serve only the "injured" party. They protect the "at fault" or accused. Simply by squelching the terms of the settlement tells you theres a cloud of greed and individual retribution being sought, not a purpose of greater good. Too, this has been actively going on far longer than the above author suggests, that 20 years? I think it's easily traced back to the day Title IX was signed. And before that really, just without the uh-oh's of potential civil suits. I am looking forward to the movie, but really, I don't thumbs up to the athelete, not at face value. She didn't make it a cause, she made it her purse. And the above line I highlight? I think is perhaps as naive as it gets. As long as the ncaa and sec has to answer to title ix they have to be taken to task at every turn of injustice they pull. They aren't stopping becuase this kid made them see the light. Alumni will continue to write the checks every month, quarter or year to their schools. An all out boycott of high school girls is the only thing that will change the face and patterns set in womens college atheletics. And that will clearly require communication between the gay hs students, guidance counselors on both ends hs and U's and some soul searching, like it and ready or not. Face it head on. I remember my closeted coaches. They weren't bad people, but they sure as hell weren't interested in changing anything. And not many seem interested now.

Psych Lit wrote:

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http://www.trainingrules.com/ coming to a theater near you

Synopsis

Jen Harris, 1991

At age three Jen Harris was running track against eight year oldsand winning. Towards the end of 5th grade she received her first recruitment letter from a college basketball program. By 9th grade she had received well over 250 recruitment letters from universities nationwide. In 2003, Jen graduated from Central Dauphin high school with academic honors. She is still the most decorated basketball player in the high school's history. Out of all the universities she could have chosen, she accepted an athletic scholarship from Pennsylvania State University and began playing basketball for the Lady Lions. A year and a half later, in March 2005, she was summarily dismissed from the team. Had she been allowed to move into her junior year, she would have been the team's leading scorer.

When Jennifer entered Penn State, Rene Portland, the Lady Lions basketball coach, had already been coaching for 23 years. During that same 23 years she made no secret of her training rulesno drugs, no drinking and no lesbians. Her intention, as stated to the Chicago Sun Times in 1986 and the Philadelphia Inquirer in 1991, was to take the stigma of lesbianism out of women's sports.

Jen on the court

Portland used tactics that were deemed "intimidating, hostile and offensive" against Jennifer when she was a Lady Lion. The indignities and ostracism that followed her dismissal resulted in depression and thoughts of suicide. Jennifer was resolute that this treatment would befall no other student athlete. In 2006, she decided to take legal action. The advocacy organization, The National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR), determined that this case was emblematic of a pervasive and stifling homophobic climate in women's collegiate sports and proceeded to file charges against Portland, athletic director Tim Curley, and Penn State University. The suit alleged discrimination based on perceived sexual orientation, racism and gender stereotyping. At the time, Jennifer had no idea how many others would break their painful silence of decades to share similar stories of abuse and discrimination.

Training Rules takes the disturbing facts of the Harris vs. Portland case and personalizes their impact by telling Jennifer's story as well as those of six other women who were victimized through the years. Together they unveil a litany of betrayal, abuse, humiliation and bigotry. Softball coach Sue Rankin, whose activism contributed to passing the 1992 inclusion of sexual orientation into Penn State's non-discrimination policy, was pressured by the athletic department to disengage from her activities. Her outspokenness precipitated a decline in her coaching evaluations. Each of these young athletes was at the top of her game when she was dismissed. Sue Rankin's coaching evaluations had been excellent.

Known as "The Mommy Coach," Rene Portland made ardent promises to take good care of the young women she enlisted for her team, most of who were leaving home for the first time. During a recruitment visit in 2002, coach Portland visited Jen at her job and at home. Pearl and Lambert, Jen's parents, were delighted to host one of the winningest coaches in women's basketball. They broke bread together. Rene assured them she would be Jen's mom away from home.

It was a very different picture on March 2, 2005the end of Jen's sophomore year at Penn State. Pearl and Lambert were on their way back from Jen's out of town playoff game with Liberty College. It was after 1am when Jen called them in tears. Just minutes before, Rene had brusquely and dispassionately dismissed Jen from the Lady Lions.

Cindy Davis

Student athlete Cindy Davies, whose talents were so extraordinary that she was recruited for the Olympic trials her senior year in high school, was an early casualty of Coach Portland's discrimination. Her story parallels that of the other Lady Lions (also characters in the film) who were dismissed, or forced to leave the team.

While Jen Harris, Cindy Davies and others were recovering from the trauma and devastation of lost scholarships, self-esteem and promising basketball careers, coach Portland flourished. She was twice voted "Coach of the Year" by the Women's Basketball Coaches Association (WBCA). Once in 1991, the same year the Philadelphia Inquirer article came out and again in 2004. In addition, she won that same honor four times in her Big Ten division. She also held the title of President of the Women's Basketball Coaches Association (WBCA) from 1989-1990.

It is notable that all of the women whose lives were dismantled by Coach Portland decry her discrimination, but without exception testify that she is, technically, an exceptional coach. No one has challenged her strategic knowledge of the game. She was a winning coach who filled the stands and brought elite players to her program. Her reward was an impenetrable encasement in the protective bubble of a powerful athletic department.

Rene Portland

Although Jen's story of harassment and dismissal repeats itself with remarkable consistency among other basketball players at her school, this is a tale told not just at Penn State, but also at universities and colleges across the country. Rene Portland may be a blatant example of homophobia in women's sports, but she is NOT the only coach who discriminates based on sexual orientation. Penn State is NOT the only university that disregards its own code of ethics in order to preserve its cash flow.

PSU Protest

How was this allowed to happen? It is well known that Coach Portland, as well as certain other college coaches, discriminate. It is public information. Where were the National Collegiate Athletics Association (NCAA), the Women's Basketball Coaches Association (WBCA), and the university when coach Portland's unfettered statements of bias were made to the press?

If these statements were being made in reference to race, i.e., no drugs, no drinking, no blacks, Jews, Asians . . . how silent would they have been? How has this culture of silence diminished women's sports? What are the consequences to Coach Portland's basketball program at Penn State? Although Rene Portland's career demonstrates an impressive win loss record, she has never won a national title. Can a team living in fear really win it all?

When the last image of Training Rules fades from the screen, some of these questions are answered, others are raised, and a tangled web of discrimination is exposed.

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This is rampant and disgusting. The ncaa and sec are equally oppressive and mysogonistic. The greater disgrace is the number of women that are active participants in maintaining the behavior. If the mindset, excuse, for the coaches actions was to "remove the stigma of lesbianism" it could just as easily and certainly more high roadish been to subtly dismantle sexuality and relationships as they relate to sports. Dismantle the idea that an individuals sexuality is WRONG.  I can't think of a single sport that men participate in, on any level, that creates such an environment of hate as does womens college basketball.  JCA, even male cheerleaders have it easier. I'm also relieved to see Poky Chatmans name and scandal didn't come into this story. It certainly wouldn't have helped anything. That too was a ncaa disgrace. And a blatant disservice by Chatman to the 2007 final four Tigers.  It's not even changing at a snails pace. It's not changing at all. But yanno? Don't go to the sit in, the park, the gayday that can't take place because of cash. Don't come out of the freaking closet. Do we control our own lives or does someone else. It's alot to ask of a college sophomore, but too bad. There is a critical need to be LOUD. And now that I'm all pissed off I just realized it isn't her freaking JOB to take a stigma out of anything, it's her job to coach a team. I hope her 401k tanked along with all her millions. And she can go to the same hell as Pat Summit for all I care.

Synopsis

Jen Harris, 1991

At age three Jen Harris was running track against eight year oldsand winning. Towards the end of 5th grade she received her first recruitment letter from a college basketball program. By 9th grade she had received well over 250 recruitment letters from universities nationwide. In 2003, Jen graduated from Central Dauphin high school with academic honors. She is still the most decorated basketball player in the high school's history. Out of all the universities she could have chosen, she accepted an athletic scholarship from Pennsylvania State University and began playing basketball for the Lady Lions. A year and a half later, in March 2005, she was summarily dismissed from the team. Had she been allowed to move into her junior year, she would have been the team's leading scorer.

When Jennifer entered Penn State, Rene Portland, the Lady Lions basketball coach, had already been coaching for 23 years. During that same 23 years she made no secret of her training rulesno drugs, no drinking and no lesbians. Her intention, as stated to the Chicago Sun Times in 1986 and the Philadelphia Inquirer in 1991, was to take the stigma of lesbianism out of women's sports.

Jen on the court

Portland used tactics that were deemed "intimidating, hostile and offensive" against Jennifer when she was a Lady Lion. The indignities and ostracism that followed her dismissal resulted in depression and thoughts of suicide. Jennifer was resolute that this treatment would befall no other student athlete. In 2006, she decided to take legal action. The advocacy organization, The National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR), determined that this case was emblematic of a pervasive and stifling homophobic climate in women's collegiate sports and proceeded to file charges against Portland, athletic director Tim Curley, and Penn State University. The suit alleged discrimination based on perceived sexual orientation, racism and gender stereotyping. At the time, Jennifer had no idea how many others would break their painful silence of decades to share similar stories of abuse and discrimination.

Training Rules takes the disturbing facts of the Harris vs. Portland case and personalizes their impact by telling Jennifer's story as well as those of six other women who were victimized through the years. Together they unveil a litany of betrayal, abuse, humiliation and bigotry. Softball coach Sue Rankin, whose activism contributed to passing the 1992 inclusion of sexual orientation into Penn State's non-discrimination policy, was pressured by the athletic department to disengage from her activities. Her outspokenness precipitated a decline in her coaching evaluations. Each of these young athletes was at the top of her game when she was dismissed. Sue Rankin's coaching evaluations had been excellent.

Known as "The Mommy Coach," Rene Portland made ardent promises to take good care of the young women she enlisted for her team, most of who were leaving home for the first time. During a recruitment visit in 2002, coach Portland visited Jen at her job and at home. Pearl and Lambert, Jen's parents, were delighted to host one of the winningest coaches in women's basketball. They broke bread together. Rene assured them she would be Jen's mom away from home.

It was a very different picture on March 2, 2005the end of Jen's sophomore year at Penn State. Pearl and Lambert were on their way back from Jen's out of town playoff game with Liberty College. It was after 1am when Jen called them in tears. Just minutes before, Rene had brusquely and dispassionately dismissed Jen from the Lady Lions.

Cindy Davis

Student athlete Cindy Davies, whose talents were so extraordinary that she was recruited for the Olympic trials her senior year in high school, was an early casualty of Coach Portland's discrimination. Her story parallels that of the other Lady Lions (also characters in the film) who were dismissed, or forced to leave the team.

While Jen Harris, Cindy Davies and others were recovering from the trauma and devastation of lost scholarships, self-esteem and promising basketball careers, coach Portland flourished. She was twice voted "Coach of the Year" by the Women's Basketball Coaches Association (WBCA). Once in 1991, the same year the Philadelphia Inquirer article came out and again in 2004. In addition, she won that same honor four times in her Big Ten division. She also held the title of President of the Women's Basketball Coaches Association (WBCA) from 1989-1990.

It is notable that all of the women whose lives were dismantled by Coach Portland decry her discrimination, but without exception testify that she is, technically, an exceptional coach. No one has challenged her strategic knowledge of the game. She was a winning coach who filled the stands and brought elite players to her program. Her reward was an impenetrable encasement in the protective bubble of a powerful athletic department.

Rene Portland

Although Jen's story of harassment and dismissal repeats itself with remarkable consistency among other basketball players at her school, this is a tale told not just at Penn State, but also at universities and colleges across the country. Rene Portland may be a blatant example of homophobia in women's sports, but she is NOT the only coach who discriminates based on sexual orientation. Penn State is NOT the only university that disregards its own code of ethics in order to preserve its cash flow.

PSU Protest

How was this allowed to happen? It is well known that Coach Portland, as well as certain other college coaches, discriminate. It is public information. Where were the National Collegiate Athletics Association (NCAA), the Women's Basketball Coaches Association (WBCA), and the university when coach Portland's unfettered statements of bias were made to the press?

If these statements were being made in reference to race, i.e., no drugs, no drinking, no blacks, Jews, Asians . . . how silent would they have been? How has this culture of silence diminished women's sports? What are the consequences to Coach Portland's basketball program at Penn State? Although Rene Portland's career demonstrates an impressive win loss record, she has never won a national title. Can a team living in fear really win it all?

When the last image of Training Rules fades from the screen, some of these questions are answered, others are raised, and a tangled web of discrimination is exposed.

Nightowlhoot3 wrote:

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Psych Lit wrote:

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i saw this today and it bothered me.  this part of the continuing campaign to closet women athletes. blech.




Yeah, Chantelle has a rather narrow view of what "a woman looks like" IMO. Sad she seems to discount (even in her effort to effect the precise opposite) the "womanliness" which may be had sans makeup and short dresses.

The women to whom I'm attracted look nothing like her "tribute" women, and make no mistake, they look VERY MUCH like women to me. and attractive ones, at that.  :)

And I hate to sound dismissive and reductive, but ... "she's young." :) I don't think it's homophobia, though, so much as that gender thing, really, you know?

 

she did respond to the comment i left on her blog tho was apparently confused about what i meant. mebbe ill tackle that answer tomorrow when i am not so tired.  she did make this posting on her blog today tho.

Why Men Hate Lesbians...

submitted by Chantelle7
3 days ago  |  155 comments  |  Email to a Friend

-- Let me preface this by saying this is all in good fun and not meant to offend ANYONE! That said, here we go -- You always hear about men having lesbian fantasies, or how they thing its hot for two women to hook up. So why then, do people always use the "lesbian factor" as an excuse to hate womens basketball? I'll tell you why: because men love lesbians, as long as they're straight. I realize a straight lesbian is a total oxymoron. But what I mean is, men don't mind girls getting drunk and making out with each other, or singing songs about kissing girls, because at the end of the day, those same girls are still in the market for men. Meaning the guys still have a chance to have sex with them. But as soon as you remove the do-ability factor, the hope that he might have a chance at getting her in bed, men all the sudden are just not that interested. Random men come up to me all the time and tell me, "I could take you 1 on 1." It doesn't matter if they're 50 pounds overweight or haven't picked up a basketball since high school. For their ego to stay in tact, they need to sincerely believe its impossible to get beat by a girl. The same applies in relationships. A guy imagining another man being able to satisfy a woman better is uncomfortable. But to think a woman could do it? Now that's just downright insulting! What you men have to understand is that its not even about you. For example, if a guy I was dating came to me and said he was attracted to men, should I get mad and assume its because my sex was terrible? No, because obviously a man can offer him something very different than I can. And if that's what he wants, there is NOTHING I can do for him. Same thing! If a woman truly wants a woman, then it has nothing to do with the quality, or lack thereof, of your "lovin". Now I know its going to take y'all a little while to internalize this information. So in the meantime, here are some tips to enjoying the WNBA this summer: 1. Pay attention and appreciate the basketball being played (similar to listening to a woman with a degree from Harvard talk instead of staring at her boobs - it won't kill you, I promise) 2. Bring you daughter and her AAU teammates. You can check out our dancers while they enjoy the game (our dancers are pretty hot) 3. Come with your hot wife and enjoy watching men AND women checking her out with the knowledge that you can "hit it" anytime you want (lol) 4. And finally, fantasize about the straight players that you can still dream about doing (there are A LOT of us, and this is probably the easiest solution for you) I look forward to seeing you all at a WNBA game this summer! Opening day is June 6th. LOL